Who I Am

Indy #FTW

This past week was spent in the subzero temperatures of Indianapolis at a conference. SUBZERO folks. They hit RECORD LOWS while I was there. And by record lows I mean 4 degrees and lower. I didn't see the sun for 5 days, but I DID have to walk outside at night. Twice. But Indy is so walkable it wasn't the end of the world. Aaaannnnnd I actually like the cold. What?

And to be honest, I would never have expected to get so much out of a sales negotiations training or a session on email deliverability. I actually knew what they meant with they said DNS records, email authentication and SPF. The technology industry makes you such a nerd. But it is encouraging to know that this is the one industry that will continuously be moving forward - so I'm trying to soak in all the information I can. And by "soak in" I mean, I instagram, doodle, and get coffee with smart people and hope by some form of osmosis the information in their brain gets into mine. Because most of this is still a foreign language and world to me. Thanks for nothing event and mission trip planning jobs.

But at the end of the day, I'm grateful to be pushed and challenged. I'm grateful that I still have so much to learn, and that there are thousands of incredible people around me to help. I rub shoulders with some of the smartest and most humble people in the world, and they are doing BIG things. And going BIG places. And handling BIG accounts (think Microsoft, Lexus, Delta and Papa John's). So bring on the challenge! I welcome you with open arms.

Number three on the far left does say "Unlimited Derek Grant sponsored Jaeger bombs". These were a list of our top 10 conference takeaways. Two related to Derek Grant's Jaeger bombs, 1 related to standup comedy (also performed by DG), and 2 related to karaoke. Obviously this was a meaningful week.

But the good news is that these tech-savvy work things always include crazy good food, drinks, and kick-ass activities. This week we had a casino night followed by karaoke (yes I participated, and no, I wasn't drunk), and then the next night was improv at a swanky ballroom with build-your-own tacos and stir-fry, followed by churros and bowls of ice cream in a waffle cone. 

Dang. 

Hello freshman 15. 

Again.

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I also learned this little treasure thanks to Adam Berry from the UK:

Yep, and I ALWAYS do my peace signs like that. Awesome. 

Just keepin' it real folks.

Italia and then some

For mine and Patrick's FIFTH anniversary (dang, where did the time go!?), we have bought tickets to visit the most beautiful country in the world...

ITALY.

Going to Italy has been a dream of ours ever since I can remember.

And Julia Roberts really sealed the deal for me in Eat, Pray, Love through her attractive male friends and 'no carb left behind' policy. Who doesn't want to go somewhere that is strictly known for its beauty, wine, pizza, and cappaccinos? I'm not quite sure how they stay so thin and beautiful with such high pasta consumption, but I fully intend to investigate. And by investigate I mean eat everything in sight and wear stretchable leggings every day, on the off chance that my pants will stop fitting by day 3. Surely you're not taking advantage of Italy if your pants still fit by the end of the week.

But I digress...

This will probably be our last big trip before we start incorporating children into the family, AND IT CANNOT GET HERE FAST ENOUGH. I'm jumping out of my pants excited over this, and can't wait to take advantage of this country of such immense and stunning beauty!!! Come on March! I've never been so excited about you.

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In other news...life without HaRim is hard. We feel like true empty-nesters and have subsequently read a lot of books, watched all of our DVR, and re-organized our closets. I bought some extra magazines, did some wash, lamented cooking because I was cooking for 2 and not 3, and I got some links taken out of my watch. Annnddd I also framed a few pictures. And by a few I mean 5.

All because I've had time to do those things. 

But at the end of the day, I'm so incredibly grateful for the time we had with Harim. And I'm glad that he is happy and thriving and had a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to live on his own for 3 months at 15. You learn a lot about yourself by living on your own, and we're blessed to have gotten to see him step into more of himself. 

2013 Resolution

And less everyone else.

Bittersweet Good-byes

This morning we took our precious HaRim to the airport to fly home to Korea. We know how excited he is to go back to the more familiar things, but we were of course devastated to watch him go through security and turn left around the corner to his gate. We know that this is only the beginning of our journey as friends, so we are hopeful for the many years to come. But today was still a sad day, with hundreds of tears shed and hugs given.

We celebrated HaRim last night with 20 of his friends, and a handful of our friends who have gotten to spend some time with him during his stay. Watching him be loved on by everyone was so beautiful. It was obvious to us that his friends see all the greatness in him that we see, and were elated to honor him with us.

I wish I could adequately articulate who HaRim is to you, if you didn't get a chance to meet him. His heart is huge, which is shown through the dozens of cards he's written us, the piano songs he learned, the meals he's cooked, and the dish washing that he helped with almost every night. He asked about curse words and pop music, birth control and drinking. He tried every food put in front of him, took our recommendations at restaurants, tried his first cup of coffee, prayed for our future children, and enabled us to push the doors of our home open a little further (which you never feel comfortable doing until someone makes you).

He continually gave of himself to serve our home and family, and in the most simple but meaningful ways.

We couldn't keep secrets from each other because HaRim told them all, which made us all a little bit more kind and a little bit more sincere with our words. We knew that he was watching us, and would ask if we were mad if we were quiet for too long. He'd wonder if we were ever sad or lonely, and would pray for anyone he heard of going through a difficult time. He was observant, and always looking for who he wanted to be in every situation.

He never withheld a compliment, and always made it a point to tell me when I looked beautiful. We heard him share with his friends how loved he is and what awesome American parents he has. We sang for him so he could learn tunes to piano songs, we taught him how to do wash, and we let him teach us how to fully love someone as if he's your own.

Unfortunately we did laugh a time or two at his expense. But we at least made an effort to explain when we could. Yes, you need to decorate yourself for dinner. No, you have to use soap when you clean the dishes, not lotion. And yes, you do have to put soap in the washing machine. Yeah, we're going to need to cook that bacon a little longer. America doesn't eat raw meat. Yes, we need to wash your pants. 5 weeks is too long without clean clothes. No, we don't need another bowl of ramen noodles, anchovies, or squid, but yes, we'll always help you try a new recipe. No, seaweed is not our favorite, but we love your fried rice and cooked peppers. Yes, 'damn it' is a bad word. No you can't take a flask on your retreat for your juice. 

We are so ready for our own babies, and having HaRim made our hearts hope even more for that dream to be realized. We truly love HaRim more than anything in this world, and know that our lives will never be the same again. The home and family he helped us build will be a part of our children, and a part of our children's children. Patrick and I are richly blessed, and love that you got to take this journey with us.

Love you all!

Tears

So much is distilled in our tears...I have learned that if you follow your tears, you will find your heart. And if you find your heart, you will find what is dear to God. And if you find what is dear to God, you will find the answer to how you should live your life. 


-Ken Gire

Make-up Updates

In a vain attempt to update my make-up, I watched some tutorials online for how to better highlight and contour my face. Am I going to a party? Nope. Am I dressing up for the red carpet? Nah. I'm just realizing that it has been entirely too long since I updated my make-up brushed up on my make-up techniques. And rumor has it you should consider yourself out of style if you haven't made an update to your look in at least 5 years. Ouch. So I decided that maybe its time to re-visit Sephora and get some tips from the pros. 

So I did just that. In an effort to update my look, and figure out if what I'm using is really best for me and the coverage I want. 

And here are the products that made it to my shopping bag:

1. Benefit's Sun Beam highlighter: This was a little extra sample that I got in my bag, but I really love it. I'll use it over top of the concealer around my eyes to add a little bit more shimmer. If my skin was a tad bit tanner, it would be perfect on its own, but I needed the concealer to play the middleman so I didn't look like my eyes had been to the tanning bed.

2. Benefit's Coralista blush: When learning how to highlight and contour my face (which I'd never heard of until Pinterest), this was one of the products that was recommended...plus its a Victoria's Secret go-to. So you would hear no argument from me. There are only 2-3 colors, but they are light and shimmery which makes it easy for any skin type to wear it.  

3. Maybelline's illuminating concealer: This little guy came from Target, and quickly made me feel more 'put-together'. Not sure how a concealer/highlighter can do that, but trust me, its awesome. I use this around the inside of my eyes, just under the outer part of my brow, down my nose, and a little bit around my lips. I'm amazed at how a little bit of light-ness can make your features pop.

4. Benefit's Hoola bronzer: This is another item that can work for any skin color. I learned that the trick with a bronzer like this is to have it be matte, rather than have a sheen to it. The goal is to create more definition in your cheekbones and around your nose. I was impressed with how easy it is to draw attention to certain features or minimize others depending on what features you want to accent. Unfortunately I have not yet mastered this art, but I'm practicing. :)

5. Smashbox Color Correcting primer: This stuff is definitely green, but is meant to smooth your skin, remove any redness, and absorb any oil in your skin so that it doesn't hurt your make-up. I saw this bottle and thought it would be absurd to put on my skin, but after the woman at Sephora tried it on my face I was completely dumb-founded. My skin has so much redness to it that I LOVED the way this cream evened out my skin-tone. Without any powder, foundation, blush, etc. my face was already looking better. 

Do you have any go-to products that you really enjoy? I'm on the market for new ideas and updates, so give me your best stuff.

Happy shopping (and updating)!

Changing the World

"People who really want to make a difference in the world usually do it, in one way or another. And I've noticed something about people who make a difference in the world: They hold the unshakable conviction that individuals are extremely important, that every life matters. They get excited over one smile. They are willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound. They aren't determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they're satisfied with small changes. Over time, though, the small changes add up. Sometimes they even transform cities and nations, and yes, the world." - Kisses from Katie

Dreaming of Africa

One of my favorite memories was from May of 2007. It was my second week in Karatina, Kenya, and we were spending some time at a rural school. The temperature was warm, but not unbearable despite our proximity to the equator. Each day was spent in schools, orphanages, homes, or in fields with frisbees or soccer balls. This day was spent listening in on an African classroom, and organizing fun games and activities for the kids during their breaks.

When you're in Kenya, or probably in any African nation, white people are not very common. Especially the further you go out into the bush. Sometimes kids would hide behind their parents if you made them uneasy, but others would come bounding up to you and want to pat your hands and touch your hair and kiss your cheeks. I remember one specific girl at the school that day. She had some sort of mental delay, but was the giggliest girl I've ever heard. She danced everywhere she walked, and wanted to be continually tickled. 

She sat on my lap throughout her school lessons, but if you moved her or touched her in a certain way, she would crack up. It was kind of like how I feel when I play "Honey if you loved me, would you please, please smile." People can't even get to me before tears are rolling down my cheeks. 

That's how this girl was. Joyful. Happy. Energetic, and just so excited to be where she was. To be holding someone's hand whom she'd never met. To be listening to stories and math lessons, and to be tickled by the slightest movement of my body. At one point she had to go to the bathroom, and I heard her laughing the whole way, screeching in delight at the thought of what she was doing that day with complete strangers. The picture below shows her listening to another villagers ringtone on his phone. She laughed and danced, playing the tones over and over until tears streamed down her sweet face. 

I think we have a misunderstanding of Africans. We so easily see them as poor and destitute, when in reality, we are the ones that are poor. They are the ones who are truly rich. They possess an inexplicable joy and contentment with their lives, and are so grateful for the rains, the animals, and their land. They're grateful for the one beautiful skirt that they have, or the pile of sticks in the field that can be turned into a game. They're grateful that they have food to share today, not that they might not have food for tomorrow. They are generous and warm, and I don't know that I've ever known a season of such great peace than when I was in Kenya. Their hearts bled into mine. Their peace and excitement and love were infectious. I felt at home there in a way I've never felt in America. And maybe it was because they know the value of life, and appreciate it so fondly. 

What's been stirring my heart for Africa lately is Kisses from Katie. A beautiful story about an 18 year-old girl that picks up her life in 2007 and moves to Uganda. She's adopted 14 children, and spends day after day loving the least of these. Tending to wounds, filling hungry bellies, and worshiping with children kneeling beside her. Her story reminds me so much of me, and my heart and my desire for the nations. I feel like Katie is helping me wake up from years of sleeping, and pulling me back to the true reality of the Kingdom. Of loving. Of tending sheep. Of making a difference in one life at a time. 

I also had the honor of sending Frankie to Kenya yesterday. Reading her first blog post on Kenyan soil made me excited for the life-changing experience she's about to have. The kind of experience that will never part with heart, and will leave her longing to stay a little longer, have one more cup of coffee, and  dive a little deeper into God's presence. These beautiful women who are doing amazing things inspire me. And remind me that Africa and the world is still a part of my heart. And I can still make a difference.

Book Reviews: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and Gone Girl

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo: This book was intense, y'all. Not necessarily full of twists and turns, but definitely an edge-of-your-seat thriller.

I had heard that the movies were violent, so I hesitated in starting this book because I didn't want to read page after page of sexual violence. And to some degree people were right, but Stieg Larsson was extremely short-winded in those scenes, and developed no attachment in me to those specific characters. So that meant I could read 'from a distance', yet still experience the gravity of the story.

The writing was quickly paced, and the characters were original and quirky.  I'd be interested in knowing what it was in Larsson's background that made him understand the ins and outs of serial rapists and their strategies in capturing their next victim. The thought in that regard blew my mind. I hope the next books are as explosive and multi-dimensional as this one. Definitely worth your time.

Gone Girl: This book I have VERY mixed feelings for. If I could write a response to the first 90% of the book and the last 10% of the story, I would. Because they felt like completely separate stories and authors.

Gillian Flynn became one of my new favorite authors within the first 50 pages. She is brilliant, and just twisted enough that her stories and characters are 100% unpredictable. The book FLEW by, but came to a screeching halt about 90% of the way through when you realize what the ending will be. And the ending is so completely disappointing, that you wonder if the book was worth reading for that kind of let-down. You put too much energy into the book for the ending not to completely ruin the experience.

Overall did I like it? Yes, very much.

Would I recommend it? Eh. If you can stomach the ending.