Sunday, January 31, 2010

Too busy for me.

So, I've decided that I'm too busy. I want to read more. and be more crafty. Take more walks/jogs (let's be honest I hate running, so jogging might be a stretch). Do yoga and pilates. Cook more meals from scratch. Watch more movies. Spend more time getting coffee with friends. Journal and memorize Scripture. Send more letters. And invest more in my outreach team. There is a lot that I want to do every week, and for some reason I never get to any of these things.

I have a tendency to go where people are because I don't want to miss anything thats happening. I keep up with friend's blogs and facebook. I research news articles and websites. I am always filling my mind with lots of things to feel like I'm not missing out, but in the end...I end up missing out on me and my life. There are things in me that need attention.

I try so hard to be a part of everyone else's community that I feel like I've lost my own. I need a retreat. A respite from work and people and tv and computers and cell phones. I need to re-discover my soul. Re-discover what I love and want to dedicate my time to. I don't want my time to be wasted on meaningless things. I want my life to be significant and bent on one vision...bringing the Kingdom to earth. that's all that matters. the Kingdom. And what God's doing and where He's going. I want to be part of that community

Thursday, January 7, 2010


In 2010, I will learn to feed myself. To encounter God on my own. To pursue Him without prompting. To strengthen myself. To develop intimacy in ways I never have before. To walk around offenses and give grace to others. To steward my gifts and invest in others. To count my blessings.

"In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord." Is. 6:1. Although Uzziah was a great and mighty king, and very influential in Isaiah's life, he wasn't going to be around forever. Having seen one of his strongest mentors die, Isaiah was prompted to seek and find the Lord on his own. And he did. This is my season of learning to find God on my own. To feast on Him daily. To count my blessings and experience His love. To sacrifice so that others might know Him and His love through me. To be willing to go when He says go.


I am terrified. Will I find Him? Will I gain new revelations of love and learn how to go deeper and deeper into His presence? Will I have the grace to pour out? Will I have the patience to sit at His feet?

All I know as of now is this...

God is good and I am blessed. And fully loved.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010


"Remember wherever you go and whatever culture you find yourselves in, always be a LEARNER of the people and what God has to teach you. I feel like I am constantly re-learning how to humble myself in this way."

- Suzanne and Joey Johnson (my Kenya team leaders)

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Chinese Christians

A brief attempt to expose the unbelievable faith of Chinese believers:

"They are not only ready to die for the gospel, but they are expecting it."

"Many Western missionary organizations pull their workers out of a place as soon as there is any sign of trouble. Advance will be very slow with such a mentality! If self-preservation is that important, then there is no point in going in the first place. God is looking for children who will die for Him if necessary."

Chinese believers PRACTICE getting out of handcuffs and breaking out of prison buildings.

"Don't pray for the persecution to stop! We shouldn't pray for a lighter load to carry, but a stronger back to endure!"

The Chinese church refuses to build any church building that could divide believers.

Some Chinese believers rejoice when they are sent to prison because there are hundreds more men that get to hear the gospel.

Some Chinese believers do baptisms in the middle of night in the winter, by cutting a hole in the ice of a frozen lake. This is the only time that authorities are not prowling around looking for "suspicious" activity. Some report that the water is never cold, and it almost feels like bath water.

-thoughts and quotes from "Back to Jerusalem" compiled by Paul Hattaway (highlighting the lives of 3 Chinese church leaders- Brother Yun, Peter Xu Yongze, and Enoch Wang)

Friday, January 1, 2010

2010 Declarations

Life and death is in the power of the tongue. And our ability to declare things and speak them into existence is extremely powerful and weighty when you consider that we have the ability to release life or death in the earth.

Here are some of my declarations about what 2010 will bring.

-This will be a year of rediscovering joy.
-In 2010, I will KNOW peace. Deep and abiding peace.
-I will experience greater depths of God's love this year, love that I never thought possible will be made known to me.
-I will walk gracefully around offenses, and honor every single person I meet, regardless of their attitude or response to me.
-This will be a year of abundant giving.
-We will walk in divine health.
-We will continually live out of God's presence.

God loves to make Himself known in the lives of His children, and I anxiously await all the good things in store for 2010.