Book Reviews: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and Gone Girl

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo: This book was intense, y'all. Not necessarily full of twists and turns, but definitely an edge-of-your-seat thriller.

I had heard that the movies were violent, so I hesitated in starting this book because I didn't want to read page after page of sexual violence. And to some degree people were right, but Stieg Larsson was extremely short-winded in those scenes, and developed no attachment in me to those specific characters. So that meant I could read 'from a distance', yet still experience the gravity of the story.

The writing was quickly paced, and the characters were original and quirky.  I'd be interested in knowing what it was in Larsson's background that made him understand the ins and outs of serial rapists and their strategies in capturing their next victim. The thought in that regard blew my mind. I hope the next books are as explosive and multi-dimensional as this one. Definitely worth your time.

Gone Girl: This book I have VERY mixed feelings for. If I could write a response to the first 90% of the book and the last 10% of the story, I would. Because they felt like completely separate stories and authors.

Gillian Flynn became one of my new favorite authors within the first 50 pages. She is brilliant, and just twisted enough that her stories and characters are 100% unpredictable. The book FLEW by, but came to a screeching halt about 90% of the way through when you realize what the ending will be. And the ending is so completely disappointing, that you wonder if the book was worth reading for that kind of let-down. You put too much energy into the book for the ending not to completely ruin the experience.

Overall did I like it? Yes, very much.

Would I recommend it? Eh. If you can stomach the ending. 

Love and War

A few weeks ago, Marcy encouraged me to read “Love and War” by John and Stasi Eldridge. And I politely said, “No, thanks. I don't like John and Stasi Eldridge.” But she responded with “Hey. You're reading this book. Sorry.” Except she didn't apologize. She just told me to suck it up and order the book, and said it might provide some good talking points with Patrick. Ugh. Fine.

So I did what she said. I got a $3 copy off Amazon and prayed that it got lost in the mail. Because I'd rather read Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn which comes way more highly recommended than some lame-o Christian-y book, by the authors of Wild at Heart and captivating. Two books that made me want to vomit. (Not really. That was sarcastic. But they weren't my faves).

Well the book came and sat on my nightstand for a few weeks. And Marcy is a nice and classy girl and never asked about it. But I got to a stopping point in another series I was reading, and decided one night before bed that I would start picking through the dreaded “Love and War.”

And y'all, I couldn't put it down.

The weight of every word seemed to settle on me in a way I didn't expect. And I was challenged. Convicted. Empathized with. And inspired. I was embarassed at how ignorant I'd been to the position of my heart in my marriage and in my relationships. But John and Stasi gave me permission to take a breath, to re-calibrate my heart, and to come at my marriage with a new and fresh perspective.

They helped me see what agreements I've been making about love and marriage. They helped me see where the enemy has set up camp in my relationship with Patrick – and what lies tend to creep into my heart when we argue. Lies that come from the enemy, and not my husband. John and Stasi helped me see how Patrick and I can be united against the enemy, rather than divided against each other. I've started to get more of a vision for mine and Patrick's relationship. And to see that we HAVE TO HAVE a vision for US, and believe in the significance and the power of US if we're ever going to make it. That when we have a family, we can't make our children the center of our universe. Because it's unhealthy for them and for us. We still have to have a relationship in the midst of children and family.

Page after page pushed every button, struck every nerve, but gave me hope for a new marriage. One that has forged through storms and mountainous terrain, yet remained intact. One that has learned to shut down the spiritual attacks that come against our marriage. And one that has experienced healing in its depths, and so gives grace to one another day in and day out. To quote John:

“So long as we choose to turn a blind eye to how we are fallen as men or women, and to the unique style of relating we have forged out of our sin and brokenness, we will continue to do damage to our marriages.”

Seeing all the crap that I alone have brought into our marriage is hard. But knowing that Patrick too brings his own stuff, from his own family, and his own mistakes to our marriage is kind of intimidating. And it has shaped us. Our thought patterns, the way we argue, the way we relate, and how we set our expectations. I'm so glad John and Stasi were so realistic about all this stuff and addressed it so candidly.

They offered hope in the midst of trials, strategies and encouragement. All of it being so insightful and powerful. Powerful in a way that gets me re-energized to fight the good fight, and to keep contending for breakthrough in our marriage and those marriages around us. I was truly blessed by “Love and War” and I hope you'll pick up a copy and challenge yourself. It will not be easy, but I'd rather know how to prepare and position my heart to thwart off attacks from the enemy.

Love you guys. Praying blessings and peace and abounding love over your marriages and relationships today. 

A note from Bob

So I was reading 'Love Does' a few weeks ago, and I came across a chapter that I wanted to share with you guys. I guess because it is so thought-provoking to me, and the words hold more and more value for me as I read over them.

What's up with equating "Bible Study" with knowing God anyway? Wouldn't it be a horrible thing if we studied the ones we loved instead of bonding in deeper ways by doing things with them? I'd never want to get married to a girl no matter how much I studied her. I'd rather take her sailing or fishing or eat cotton candy with her on a Ferris wheel. I don't think knowing her name in Greek is going to help me love her more. In fact, they have a name for guys who just study things about a person they like but don't do anything about it - they're called bachelors.

...

So I started getting together with the same guys each week and instead of calling it a Bible study, we call it a "Bible doing." We've been at it for 15 years now, and I've found there's a big difference between the two. At our Bible doing, we read what God has to say and then focus all of our attention on what we are going to do about it. Just agreeing isn't enough. I can't think of a single time where Jesus asked His friends to just agree with Him. 

...

If you get engaged like that, you'll be able to remember Bible verses better because you're living them instead of just reading them. Another by-product of engagement is all the canned answers we have to complex questions melt away. I think that is because we see ourselves in the context of something larger that is unfolding. The details aren't distractions; they are ladder rungs we can pull ourselves up on. We remember because we are no longer observers. I think Jesus had in mind that we would not just be 'believers' but 'participants.' Not because it's hip, but because it's more accurate, more fitting that way. He wanted people who got to the 'do' part of faith, not because he wanted activity, but because He wanted our faith to matter to us. 

...

We need to make our faith our very own love story.

...

Collecting information about someone is not the same as knowing a person. Stalkers are ordinary people who study from afar the people they're too afraid to really know.

This book has had some incredibly inspiring stories, and I imagine I'll read it a hundred more times. But I loved this spin on Bible studies because Bob doesn't say they are a bad thing, but just that it is all the more important to find where and how those Scriptures can intersect how we live. And how they can add to the love story you have with the Father and with Jesus. It's easy to get away from the love story piece. Because sometimes it's easier to read just to gain knowledge. But being challenged to read, and then do something with what you read is a bigger assignment. Especially if you're meeting with friends and asking each other what they are going to do with what you just read. I think that piece of accountability is hugely important, because Scriptures will mean different things to each of us. 

Which is why I wanted to share this with you guys in particular. Because I hope that this is the kind of relationship we can all have together. To spur one another on to love. And to learn better and more challenging ways to add Scriptures into our lives, and make them part of our love story.

Insurgent

In case anyone was nervous that I wouldn't be able to fill the Harry Potter void in my heart, fret no more.

My life has now been made complete by Veronica Roth (and Bob Goff, but you knew that already). 

These books are outstanding. I could not put them down, and am slightly nervous that I won't make it to the fall of 2013 for the third book without some sort of breakdown. 

For those of you who can't read that title up top in reverse, here is the official Insurgent cover. This is the second book in the Divergent series, and it is one of the rare page turners that you can't ever quit reading. I kept finding myself wanting to go to sleep or skip church or run an errand, but then something else would happen to Beatrice Prior that I knew would be a big deal. And change everything. And I just couldn't stop there. Or 100 pages later. Or 150 after that. I sat on the edge of my seat for the last 48 hours with my palms sweating and heart racing, until all concluded.... WITH A CLIFFHANGER ENDING. Uggghhhhhhhhhh. I CAN'T WAIT TIL 2013 AFTER THAT! And because I love you, I won't spoil what's going on here and deprive you of being mad about this ending too. I need someone to commiserate with.

Being a young writer, Roth has certainly proved herself to be a great story-teller. These books have tons of action, a little bit of romance laced throughout, and provide an honest look at human nature. I hope that English teachers are using these books as tools because they are jam packed with great questions, perceptions, prejudices, and realities on life and the potential future of our world if left unattended to.

So I encourage you to go to your local Target, and pick up a copy today (as Target only began carrying them this week). 

Marked that off my prayer list on Friday. 

Let me know if you guys have read anything good lately, because I'm obviously only going to flounder around and complain about the void of good books the world has to offer at this point. And you know that I will always take book suggestions. 

XOXO

Happy reading!

Love Does

I just finished Love Does by Bob Goff. Bob Goff is an incredible man with some of the most inspiring stories I've ever read. What is so challenging about him is that anyone can do the kinds of things he does. 

He gives generously, never sparing an expense when it comes to showing his love to others. And what impresses me most is that he demonstrates love in tangible ways not only to those who are close friends, but also to those who are complete strangers. Like when he sent flowers to a woman that totaled his jeep, just to remind her that it was okay and that she was forgiven. Or like when he helped a kid he met on a walk propose to his girlfriend, and found a way to get the Coast Guard involved to make it an even more spectacular event than the kid had ever imagined it to be. Or like the time his children wrote to foreign ministers, and were invited to come visit 29 of them. He sold his car to pay for plane tickets for his family to travel to those places, because he knew that those would be lifelong experiences that his children would never forget.

I read these stories and am just flat out inspired and stirred up that he has learned to love and live in such a tangible and expressive way. A way that people long for, but don't have the gumption to just do.

He helps dreamers dream. He challenges you to live outside yourself. To see others first. To let others enthrall and captivate you with who they are. He makes no excuses. He says yes, even if its hard or uncomfortable. Because that is what living a life fully engaged is all about. Creating memories now that you'll never regret.

He reminds me so much of my favorite lesson that I took away from Blue Like Jazz. That we must love others simply because they exist. Why is that so hard to do sometimes? Why is it so unbearably easy to pick apart why you should/shouldn't do something, when you know it would mean the world to someone else? Maybe we don't give ourselves enough credit. Maybe we think that it wouldn't matter to someone, when in reality we are who they need in this season. Or maybe we don't like someone, so we want to withhold our love from them. But maybe it's in the overcoming of our flaws and issues and specks that we see past what we see, and are able to lay hold of what God sees.

If someone simply asked me to see a movie tonight, I'm more inclined to say no than yes. Why is that? I love spending time with people, and I never regret a minute doing it. But sometimes its just easier to stay at home. Or easier to finish my book, or watch a movie. Because that requires virtually nothing from me. When going out would mean I'd have to spend money, look presentable, get home late, and probably use up gas in my car. But is that really how God wants us to live? Secluded in our rooms with the TV on, completely MISSING an opportunity to engage with someone? To encourage them? To be encouraged by them? To swap life stories? To be reminded that we all need love and friendship and meaning and people to believe in us? We're meant to live bigger life stories than I think we can even dream up for ourselves, and sometimes it takes someone like Bob to point that out.

Closing the final pages was incredibly difficult for me, as this book is one that will ring in my heart for decades to come. And I know that I cannot simply 'walk away' from this one. This one was different.

If I could pull apart a few of the truths that I really want to carry with me, they would be related to doing more, loving more, and engaging more. And I realize that sounds kind of stupid, but after reading these compelling and awe-inspiring stories from Bob Goff, you realize how much more you could be doing. And by “you”, I mean “I”. Because I can get lazy. And forget to be intentional. And forget that I can matter. And those are terrible things to forget. Because at the end of the day, love does.

Divergent

You guys, this book IS AWESOME.

 

I read it this past weekend and it was the PERFECT thing to get me over Harry Potter. If anything can get you over Harry Potter. 

Although dystopian novels are gaining popularity, this one does not disappoint. 

Society in futuristic Chicago is separated into 5 factions: Candor (the honest), Erudite (the intelligent), Abnegation (the selfless), Dauntless (the brave), and Amity (friendship). At the age of 16, everyone must select which faction to align themselves with. And that faction then becomes your family and your way of life. Beatrice Prior grew up in Abnegation, but has questioned whether or not she is truly selfless enough to spend her life as a part of that faction: wearing the same gray clothes as everyone else, only seeing a mirror once every other month during a hair trim, and only focusing on others rather than herself. The book follows Beatrice as she selects her new faction, and follows through on the daunting initiation process.

I could not stop reading this book y'all. And of course I promptly ordered the second one on Amazon, AND IT ARRIVED YESTERDAY. But I'm wrapping up 'Love Does' by Bob Goff first, so I haven't started it yet. The third book in the series doesn't come out until 2013 - AND I'M PRAYING THAT THERE WILL BE MORE THAN THREE. I just hate waiting for these kinds of things. And if I love the books, I want there to be 29384729356129384 so I can always read them and work the characters into my daily life. Healthy right? :)

Let me know if you want to borrow this book... I love to share. 

Book Reviews

Over the last few weeks I've read 3 books that have been VERY different, but really good.

The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown: The story is great, but not one of Brown's best (especially not after Angels and Demons and The Da Vinci Code). Similar formula to Dan Brown's other books, yet set in Washington, D.C. which adds a dimension of familiarity. I'd recommend it if you like Brown's style and ability to make symbols and history come alive in unexpected ways.

Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese: This book felt like an attempt to be like The Kite Runner, but fell slightly short of that goal. It is about twin boys that were born in Ethiopia of an Indian nun and a British surgeon. The nun died giving birth and the father fled once Sister Mary Joseph Praise died, unable to handle a life without her. The sons grew up in Ethiopia studying to be doctors, and one son fled to the U.S. after some political strife in Addis Ababa. It took about 300 pages to get into the story, but in the end it was well worth the read. Dense, but rich and insightful.

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins: This was a very fun read. Good for all ages although written for a younger audience. Set in post-Apocalyptic America, 2 teens from each of the 12 remaining districts are chosen to participate in the annual Hunger Games. It is a fight to the death and can only produce one victor. The arena is set up for the "Gamemakers" to produce storms, fires, winds, and other calamities to force those in hiding out in the open. The entire country watches the televised games each day, yet the participants have no connection to the outside world until the Games are over. Well worth the read if you need an easy-to-follow, fun, and thought-provoking book.

I'm always open to book suggestions, so feel free to share any good books that you've read!

Water for Elephants

For what it's worth, Water for Elephants (the movie) was AWESOME. I always question whether or not to see a movie if I love the book...but I feel like this movie completely lived up to the beautiful story created by Sara Gruen. I strongly encourage you to see it! The writer of the film found ways to tie in every piece of the book in some way, so I didn't leave feeling the least bit disappointed. Although there are some tough scenes to watch (which you can skip while you read, but you can't fast forward at a movie theater), it is still a neat story that leaves you feeling great to the very last minute. Fabulous movie.

Now, if I can only make it to May 6 for "Something Borrowed," May 26 for "The Hangover 2," and then November 18 for "Breaking Dawn Part 1." And yes I'm a little bit frustrated that "Breaking Dawn Part 2" does not come out until NOVEMBER OF 2012. It's already done being filmed! Why in the world would you wait ANOTHER year and a half to release it? I'm praying someone will sell me a copy on the black market, and trust me, I keep an eye on the black market for these sorts of things.

In honor of it being the first day of May tomorrow, I think I'll read the Twilight series again. Last year I promised myself I'd wait at least a year before I re-read the series, and my one year mark is tomorrow. If I disappear for weeks on end, you'll know why.

Edward. Cullen.

Don't judge me.

How the West Has Won me Over

While on my trip to Idaho, I felt like I started to understand a part of myself. Not only do I love to travel, but I love to get away. I love not having phone/internet access (although I had better service in nowhere Idaho than I do in downtown Atlanta), or being able to watch TV. I loved having a big porch that looked out into the mountains, a lake, big blue sky with no clouds, a fire in the fire pit, and family that constantly tells jokes and plays pranks.

The quietness of Driggs, Idaho seemed to engulf me. It wasn't a loud quiet, but a soft quiet that let me rest. I slept soundly. I wasn't worried about the next day's plans or what we'd have for lunch. I was completely content to grab my jacket and camera and go with whoever was going out, or to read my book on the porch. I could sleep as much or as little as I wanted, because my family wanted me to just be me. Something that is a rarity in most life situations.

My family is made up of some of my favorite people in the entire world. And getting to sit around a fire with them, wrapped in blankets, drinking wine, smoking cigars, laughing hysterically, quoting movies and just connecting with them was more joy than my soul could take. I don't think anyone could be more loved or accepted than in the presence of my family. They love well and do relationships well. I want to be and am an extension of them, and I love that.

I've been reading Donald Miller's book "Through Painted Deserts" and I never thought I'd get into it. The whole story is about Donald and his friend Paul road-tripping from Texas to Oregon. They go through boring towns, meet quirky odd people, sit on the side of the road with a broken down van, do some hiking, and occasionally buy a souvenir. B.O.R.I.N.G. Or so I thought.

But I've gotten to the place in Donald Miller's life where he is starting to embrace the quiet of the open road. He starts to see God differently. He starts to see the things he carries around differently. He starts to value things that are good to value and release the things that are dead weights around his neck. Reading this book while escaping into backwoods Idaho, Wyoming and Montana (albeit those are amazingly beautiful places to escape to), really struck a nerve with me. I started to get to know people better. To ask more questions. To sit around the fire a little longer or have an extra s'more. To stand longer in the cold because I couldn't take my eyes away from the sunset. To sleep an extra hour because my body needed it.

I felt more alive when I got away from the busyness of my life and stopped performing and trying to make everyone like me. Getting around people that just want you to be you is so freeing. I just couldn't get enough. I didn't get on Facebook or check emails because I wanted to be all there. Not leaving one foot at home and one foot in the Tetons. While I was gone, I took deeper breaths and ate bigger meals and took longer walks and hotter showers. It was perfect.

I just got to be me this weekend, and it was so refreshing. God's peace swept over me like a wool blanket and settled into my insecurities and stress, leaving me feeling invigorated and loved beyond belief. The West is truly a spectacular place and partnered with my family, an impression was made on my heart that releases me to just be me and to love people well. The West has truly won.